How to Convey Well-Being

So, the other day I read from the book of Psalms, the first time in a while I’d read from the Bible, and I felt really great for much of the day afterward.  I tried to blog about the noticeable difference in my mentality between when I don’t read (I’m much more likely to be negative) and when I do read (I’m much more likely to be positive and optimistic). 

But then I started thinking about all the naysayers, all the people who would say that there could be no real correlation between reading scripture and a person just feeling good afterward other than what they create themselves.  People who might say “Yeah Evan, you’ll feel good afterward because you subscribe to the religion and think it’s all correct; I don’t necessarily feel that way.”

And how do you get around that?  My blog turned into a huge deconstruction of hypocrisy in the church (I like to play that card with skeptics because it makes me seem introspective; and incidentally, it’s also a completely valid topic), and I just went on and on until the great feeling I’d been instilled with had all the life totally sucked out of it. 

So then I deleted everything and wrote in huge letters, four big lines: “All else being equal / I feel better on days I study scripture / Than on days I don’t / And I have no theological defense for you,” thinking I was making some huge, incredible statement, but then I realized that the impact of a statement isn’t determined by it’s font size, and deleted that post.

And so now here I am again, back at square one.  I want to say something.  But what can I say?  Did I experience a great feeling of well being after studying scripture yesterday morning?  Yes, I did.  Is it possible that the good vibes weren’t any sort of cosmic reward beamed down to me from Heaven for reading the Old Testament, but were only created in my mind because I subscribe to this religion?  Yes, it is.  Is it possible that God engineered my mind ahead of time to create in itself these feelings of well being after receipt of scripture?  Absolutely. 

Does this get anyone any closer to feeling the good feeling I’m talking about?  Probably not.

But the feeling is real.  No matter how it gets there, the feeling of fulfillment is real.  And I want to hold onto it.